Incoming!
by Javahna
Summary: Just a silly little oneshot  basically what goes through Keira's head when Jak goes past. Meant to be amusing.


_Well, this is just a silly little one-shot – meant to be amusing. But you'll have to review and tell me. Basically, it is the argument between the two halves of Keira's brain (left, the creative, emotive side, and right, the logical and sensible side) that takes place every time Jak walks past. This takes place in the space of about 4 seconds by the way. Please review and tell me what you think._

* * *

**Right:** argh, there's Jak, er…right…. battle stations!

**Left:** PHWOAR!!

**Right**: shut up left, I'm trying to think, we have to be normal here, and plan something sensible…. no random babbling or incoherent…

**Left:** whatever, cor… he looks so hot in that shirt…

**Right:** Will you concentrate!! We have to decide what to do, we have to think of something normal to say, and… and…

**Left:** why?

**Right:** well, duh, we have to make him like us!

**Left:** He does, we've known him for years and…

**Right:** NOT LISTENING!! Just shut up for two minutes and let me deal with this….oh help, he's getting closer…quick!

**Left:** Don't panic, everything will be fine. Infact, why are you even bothering to plan…let's just…. improvise!

**Right:** You know, this is the exact attitude that ruined it last time.

**Left:** I did not ruin it. It went swimmingly thank you very much.

**Right:** pff, That's what you think. But you have very little sense. I do not value your opinion in these matters. Oh no, ah ah, what are we going to say? He will expect us to say something!! Er….I know…no wait, we said that last time, oh this is so confusing.

**Left:** Chill. I'll handle this.

**Right:** NO!! Absolutely not! As if I'd let you butt in now and ruin all my hard work. Just sit down and shut up. Infact, just don't speak, just stay silent, and let me deal with this.

**Left:** you are so ungrateful. I am perfectly capable of formulating a coherent sentence. I can manage!

Phwoar, have you ever seen anyone so groovy looking? Don't you just want to…?

**Right:** Be quiet. We are not even going to go there. See? You have such a short attention span, and you get distracted so easily, you just could not manage. Although, I have to say, he is looking extra specially good today…

**Left:** Isn't he just? I love the new shirt!

**Right:** So do I! And the way his hair is kinda……STOP IT!!!! You are influencing and distracting me! We have to stop this ridiculous conversation!!! We have to think of a PLAN!!!

**Left:** I know you will never admit to this, but you enjoyed that didn't you?

**Right:** What?

**Left:** That brief moment there when you just chilled out and enjoyed the view, when you just let go, and, well, basically, you just saw what it is like all the time for me!!!

**Right:** What completely insane and delusional? I did not enjoy it, it was awful. WHY ARE WE EVEN HAVING THIS CONVERSATION?????? Oh no! Oh no no no!! Look how close he is, and we haven't thought of anything to say!

**Left:** What is it with you and talking? Talking is unnecessary. Just grab him!

**Right:** You are intolerable. Woah, it must be awful in Jak's head, he has two alter egos to contend with. It's bad enough with just you. Urgh, imagine that, dark and light Keira. I am afraid.

**Left:** Ha-ha. Very funny. It may interest you to know that it is no picnic for me either, stuck in here with you.

**Right:** OMG!! Look what's happened! Look how much time we've wasted! We have to…

**Left:** Right listen. We do not have to do anything, just stop panicking and I will….

**Right:** NO! No, whatever you want to do, just don't. Infact that applies to all situations - every time you want to do something…don't. It would save me so much agro and smoothing over.

**Left:** Huh.

**Right:** That is more like it. Now then, I think we will talk about…

**Left:** PHWOAR!! He is even better looking up close, right, GRAB HIM!!

**Right:** No! Don't! Be sensible, be normal, Jak likes normality, he doesn't see a lot of it round here. Now, er…speech.

**Right to mouth **– prepare for action!

**Left:** Yes, indeed. But forget the talking part, how many times do I have to say this? Just grab him!

**Right:** How many times do I have to say THIS? WE ARE NOT GRABBING HIM!! Now listen here, just do as I say, and…and…oh help he's almost here…

**Left:** yeah yeah. He is so amazing looking…

**Right:** Just shut up and….

**Both:** Oh damn, he's gone past.

* * *

_Haha, hope you liked it, just something strange and weird that popped into my head. Thought I would share it with you. Hope you appreciated it. You probably all think I am mad, and maybe I am, but I hope I made you laugh, if only for a second._

_Now…review. You know you want to._

_Do not hesitate._

_Just do it._

_If this was a video, I would be inserting subliminal cuts right now. But since I can't, I am just going to have to hope that you review by yourselves._


End file.
